This is Why I'll Never be an Adult

I have repeatedly discovered that it is important for me not to surpass my capacity for responsibility.  Over the years, this capacity has grown, but the results of exceeding it have not changed.

Normally, my capacity is exceeded gradually, through the accumulation of simple, daily tasks.


But a few times a year, I spontaneously decide that I'm ready to be a real adult.  I don't know why I decide this; it always ends terribly for me.  But I do it anyway.  I sit myself down and tell myself how I'm going to start cleaning the house every day and paying my bills on time and replying to emails before my inbox reaches quadruple digits.  Schedules are drafted.  Day-planners are purchased.  I stock up on fancy food because I'm also planning on morphing into a master chef and actually cooking instead of just eating nachos for dinner every night.   I prepare for  my new life as an adult like some people prepare for the apocalypse.

The first day or two of my plans usually goes okay.


For a little while, I actually feel grown-up and responsible.  I strut around with my head held high, looking the other responsible people in the eye with that knowing glance that says "I understand.  I'm responsible now too.  Just look at my groceries."

At some point, I start feeling self-congratulatory.


This is a mistake.  

I begin to feel like I've accomplished my goals.  It's like I think that adulthood is something that can be earned like a trophy in one monumental burst of effort and then admired and coveted for the rest of one's life.  


What usually ends up happening is that I completely wear myself out. Thinking that I've earned it, I give myself permission to slack off for a while and recover. Since I've exceeded my capacity for responsibility in such a dramatic fashion, I end up needing to take more recovery time than usual. This is when the guilt-spiral starts.  

The longer I procrastinate on returning phone calls and emails, the more guilty I feel about it.  The guilt I feel causes me to avoid the issue further, which only leads to more guilt and more procrastination.  It gets to the point where I don't email someone for fear of reminding them that they emailed me and thus giving them a reason to be disappointed in me.  

Then the guilt from my ignored responsibilities grows so large that merely carrying it around with me feels like a huge responsibility.  It takes up a sizable portion of my capacity, leaving me almost completely useless for anything other than consuming nachos and surfing the internet like an attention-deficient squirrel on PCP. 


At some point in this endlessly spiraling disaster, I am forced to throw all of my energy into trying to be an adult again, just to dig myself out of the pit I've fallen into. The problem is that I enter this round of attempted adulthood already burnt out from the last round. I can't not fail.  


It always ends the same way.  Slumped and haggard, I contemplate the seemingly endless tasks ahead of me. 


And then I rebel.  

848 comments:

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Anonymous said...

I try to do everything at the same time. Sometimes it works. Sometimes not.

This is exactly why I am only a semi-adult. I'm ok with that.

Summer said...

I am possibly one of the more senior commentators, at the ripe old age of 44, and I can tell you, it doesn't get any better or any easier. I am STILL a poser. I have three children, ages 15-22 (I own an "adult" of my own?!), have been in positions of authority supervising other people, and live in a pretty nice house.

I drive up to said house every day thinking "who were the fools that lent US money to live here?", I make pilgrimages to Costco and the DIY store on weekends, and consume like a True Adult. The thing is... we never get around to the "DI" part of DIY, I still think fart jokes are hilarious, and I often write things I've already done on a to do list, just so I can cross them off ("Aha! See! I've DONE SOMETHING!"). I'll take my gold star now, please.

I keep wondering if 50 is the magic number when this adulthood thing falls into place or if I will be on my deathbed still feeling like an irresponsible kid who somehow managed to leave a legacy. Go figure.

Maximilian said...

One of your best posts! Keep it up!

Make boyfriend get groceries so you can keep blogging.

Anonymous said...

"The very definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results"

Seems to me your approach is wrong. Being an adult isn't about doing everything and then feeling burnt out. It's about learning to know your limits, doing something every day and keeping on top of things.

That said, it also means you can live your life whichever way you want. You can decide to eat Nachos, ignore the cleaning and make naps your past time. That's the beauty of being a grown up: having a choice how to live your life ;-)

Ellie said...

I do this too-though only really with exercise. Which, obviously, isn't so good for my health.

Actually I'm doing it right now with applying for jobs too. Auuuugh now I feel like I'm supposed to do it and don't want to and lksjhadlkjfhd

Anonymous said...

I use Flylady to help keep me on schedule, but I fall off the wagon regularly. I feel your pain...my 10ft round, 3 foot high pile of sentient dirty laundry says so.

Unknown said...

Can I please have a copy of that drawing of "CLEAN ALL THE THINGS!"? That made me laugh so hard...mostly because I totally get in those moods and it never lasts very long...

Anonymous said...

Wow, this is how my life goes exactly. Right now I am in the overwhelmed procrastination guilt spiral. Tons of things that I need to do and all I manage to get done is some ultra-important internet surfing...like reading this blog. I'm so glad I'm not alone! I need a trophy too.

Anonymous said...

Oh, it's me!

Mmmm, nachos.

Felix said...

This is rather similar to Canadians and seasons: Every summer we forget how cold it is in winter and wish for winter, and every winter we forget the unbearable heat of summer and pray for it to come quick.

Of course then there are weird exceptions like me who would prefer for it to be winter all the time...

jesusangelgarcia said...

Yeah, well... adulthood, so-called, is overrated. We're Americans after all, no?

I've accepted myself as a human being first and an artist a close second. As long as I'm living day-to-day with an open heart and writing or making music or working on video projects, then everything else can fall in line however/whenever/whatevah. Of course, one does have to eat, and that often requires grocery-shopping, ugh... now you've ruined my morning!

Archaeogoddess said...

At first I was all HOLY SHIT THAT'S ME DUDE!! And then this was followed by HOLY SHIT I'M NOT ALONE!! And then finally HOLY SHIT THERE ARE A LOT OF US OUT THERE. At which point I realized I should stop shouting HOLY SHIT because this may offend the elderly neighbors.

If this is the one thing that I accomplish today, I will be proud of myself. The stop shouting bit... not the offending the neighbors bit. I don't wish to offend the neighbors because... well, I don't have any good reasons, so I really should stop thinking about it before I decide to just go ahead and offend them anyway.

This comment is a little insane. I'm sorry.

Jade Carver said...

jesusangelgarcia: actually, "we're" not all Americans.

Rebekah said...

OMG.... I always feel like I am reading about my life when I read your blog -- only you have the ability to tell stories in a very funny way, while I do not.

My favorite part? "Clean all the things?" and the end... "INTERNET -- FOREVER!"

You are brilliant. :)

熊の娘 said...

I think this is something everyone goes through. Your great at getting these feelings into words!
<3

Anonymous said...

one more reason to stalk and kidnap you for forced love sessions allie...

Ellie said...

This is my life, encapsulated in one superbly poignant string of images and words.

Just remember, when you get overwhelmed and stress, to take five and realize it DOES NOT FUCKING MATTER ONE BIT, because you HAVE the stuff, WILL ALWAYS have the stuff, and sooner or later someone in a position of power is going to recognize that, and you, my dear, will get every ounce of fame and fortune you deserve (which is a lot).

Jaleh D said...

Attention deficit squirrel on PCP

*on floor, beating it with hands and feet and shrieking in laughter like a mad monkey, gets strange looks from other "adult" in room*

Emily Barton said...

You are a genius. Plain and simple. Do not worry about being an adult. Geniuses don't have to be adults.

Kelly said...

How appropriate that this was posted on my birthday. My 47th birthday mind you - and I still haven't made it any farther into adulthood than you.

My neatest trick has been managing to make my husband responsible for anything that can't be done on the internet, like PTA meetings and picking up take out.

Anonymous said...

Allie, I...wow. I'll just briefly ditto the gajillion "that's my life exactly"s (with a "but Xbox not internet"), since you've got plenty of that already!

I don't know if you'll see this since at this point you've already got hundreds of comments, but I had to say it. I noticed a while back that a commenter said you inspired him to quit his job...in my case, you saved mine!

Ever since I started reading your blog I have been strongly, strongly reminded of myself. When I went back and read through older posts about your ADD, I started to wonder. I checked out a book on ADD and actually cried when I read it because it felt like the answer to decades of "what's wroooong with me?" Then I called my doctor.

I am now on ADD medication, and while I'm still pretty scattered overall, the most noticeable change is in my job, which I hated SO MUCH I was ready to quit (I am a medical transcriptionist). There are still things I don't like about my job, but now I realize a lot of issues I blamed on the company were really my own inability to focus. My job is more tolerable now, the hours go by quicker, and my production rate is way up. I have no intentions of quitting now and no worries about making the minimum required production per week.

Now I just need to conquer the ability to get personal projects done, have conversations without forgetting what we were talking about because I went somewhere else, and read an entire book.

Bless you Allie. You make me feel laugh until I pee and you make me feel sane! :D

Steven Douglass said...

Brilliant!

Anonymous said...

You just described my life!! Down to the nachos and internet addiction. Hahaha This totally made my day. I haven't laughed this hard for a long time. :-)

Marissa said...

I feel super responsible when I pay my car insurance. Then I realize I had to sue all my money because I am actually not an adult (not really) and spent the rest of my money on things like netflix and t-shirts.

Ashley, the Accidental Olympian said...

I can never meet you.

Because if I did I would be so sad that you didn't actually have a mouth that took up 95% of your face when you got excited, and you weren't actually capable of stretching your arms 7 feet for emphasis that it would be like going to Disney Land only to find out that it didn't even exist and was simply Walt Disney's front for his elaborate crack den.

You're like the coolest cartoon, ever.

Never change.

Anonymous said...

o my god. everything below 'and then I rebel' caused a hysterical fit that took me almost 2 minutes to get under control. as I read this post I descended into giggles and then uncontrollable laughter. I wanted to keep scrolling to read more but couldn't breathe. By the time I reached the comments button I was practically suffocating. Thank you for starting my day off so well! :D

Anonymous said...

Allie - first time I have ever posted on a blog. Keep up the good work. Love your stuff. Missed you even though I only found you two weeks ago.

Calamity - Not that you are going to read this post buried in the comments, but be careful on what your doctor prescribes. I was on Ritalin as a child, and it did a terrible number on me.

Vyvanse, Desoxyn, and Adderall are all pretty good (imo), but you should also get a complete blood work up to see if that it what is truly wrong with you - check for the normal things plus hormones, thyroid (TSH, total T4, free T4, Total T3, free T3, Reverse T3), Vitamin D, Cortisol, and Ferritin. It is normally not just one thing that can be fixed with one pill (for some it is, but not most).

DMAE is also a good supplement that some people find helps their ADHD - it use to be prescribed to patients before the drug companies came out with their patentable drugs.

Good Luck.

Jennifer M said...

After reading, my son says to me, "So, mom, is that what happened to you?"

Yup.

Mike said...

I did not authorize this biography of me!

Stormy Cruz said...

Allie, my love.
I feel so guilty for not having commented recently. It's not for lack of loving you, I promise. (It is partly a result of my recent discovery of the RSS feed and partly because, at this point, I feel like one more comment is like one more grain of sand on the beach. Nothing to write home about.)

Anyway, I have to say, all I could think while reading this was "GOOD GOD! I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE!!"
The only difference between us is that I give myself the award for the tiniest of things-- like intending to get stuff done. I'll take out all my bills, my day planner, arrange it all on my bed like I'm actually going to do something with it all and think "Phew! Good work, superstar!"... skip me on the internet at 3:37 am.
Also, you must know that this: "surfing the internet like an attention-deficient squirrel on PCP" is motherfucking poetry.
As always, much love, chica.
Rock on!

Anonymous said...

<3

Chocolatesa said...

I WAS INSPIRED BY YOUR AMAZINGNESS TO DO AN ALLIE-STYLE POST MYSELF! LOOK AT IT HERE! THANK YOU FOR THE INSPIRATION :)http://kyrieeleison2008.blogspot.com/2010/06/i-am-ded-allie-style.html

Kate McQuillen said...

Wow. It makes me feel infinitely better that I am not the only one that does this. I suffer from an acute lack of organizational skills, coupled with a love to procrastinate.
Now, after reading this post, I will walk with my head held high in the grocery store, except instead of feeling oneness with my fellow "responsible" adults, I'll be thinking,
"So I work better under pressure? What the f*ck is it to you?"

Anonymous said...

I know that guilt spiral all too well. Hence almost missing the application deadline for the college I ended up going to.

Anonymous said...

I love you. Please, please post again soon. I just laughed really hard for the first time since "Texas."

Anonymous said...

I love you. Please, please post again soon. I just laughed really hard for the first time since "Texas."

Anonymous said...

If I was a leprechaun and you were a bear and your posts were nachos, then I'd totally give you a pot of gold ... and throw in a rainbow and flying unicorn for good measure. Thank you, Ali Brosh.

Agent Beryllium said...

Reading your blog feels like a cuddle from that one amazing friend who you wish you could be best friends with but you secretly think that she's too good for you, and it's seriously the highlight of your week to hang out with her.

Anonymous said...

I meant "Allie," For that, I'll throw in free lifetime internet service.

Emily said...

I'm suppose to clean ALL the things? Whaaaat?

Anonymous said...

internet forever...yes i am like that

wht we need to do is GET A LIFE...XP

LadyHelios said...

I have been following you for about two weeks.

And you make me want to laugh till I throw up.

Thanks so much.

;)

Rebekah said...

oh my gosh, it's like you have been spying on my every action and then blogged about it lol. it's nice to know i'm not the only person who suffers from this!!!

Melissa (It's a Veggieful Life) said...

A friend of mine told me about your blog today, and she was right - you ARE hysterical. But you already know that! I have some serious catching up to do since there is an entire library of your past blog posts! You need your own show, my dear!

Unknown said...

I enjoy reading your blogs so much because it's like you creep into my head and write what's in there but make it funny and not sad and pathetic.

Quilliard said...

First off Allie, I have to say:
Holy Crap.
You posted this just yesterday- about 26 hours ago-- and there are already OVER 400 comments. That's an impressive fan base.

First-point-fifth-ly, I realize that I shouldn't have capitalized "Crap" in "Holy Crap." It's like I turned crap into a proper noun. I'm sure that you can amuse yourself with that the same way you do "Alot", but I imagine the image would be much less appealing.

Secondly!
Someone else might've said this so excuse me for not reading through over 400 posts, but I personally like it when people get back to me on e-mails several days late. If I remembered that they haven't responded, then I'm finally getting what I looked forward to; if I've forgotten that I even sent them something, then out of nowhere I get a response and it's like a present!

Lily said...

My boyfriend made me go to the bank today after my month long streak of procrastinating. At the very least, he could have bribed me with food.

Jeremie said...

I showed this to my boyfriend whose response was "Seriously. It's so you. F*cker. <3"

At least he loves my non-adultness?

adequatemom said...

Please make a t-shirt with "Clean ALL the things?" and the dejected-looking girl on it. I really, really need to buy it.

adequatemom said...

Please make a t-shirt with "Clean ALL the things?" and the dejected-looking girl on it. I really, really need to buy it.

LRA said...

Meh. Being a grown up is for pansies!!!!

:D

Ashley said...

I think we're the same person. Except you're cooler than I am.

S.M.C said...

Never fails to make me laugh. Hahaha

aidel said...

At least you have the capacity for guilt. Otherwise, you'd be a sociopath. Just kidding. I totally get it. Especially on my birthday (today) I have all kinds of delusions of starting a new (responsible) life. At the end of the day, nothing's changed, so I think I'll just get drunk instead.

Annadelle said...

My daughter and I enjoy reading your blog (she's only 11 but somehow she gets you!)

I was laughing out loud when I read this one. Yes, being an adult is no fun at all. I'm a stay-at-home mom to 3 kids and my things to do list never ends!

Thank you for making my day a little brighter with your creative, funny way of expressing yourself :-)

Kate Molloy said...

@Sarah

27, teacher, home owner etc. as well. Same story. I only bring food to work that comes pre-packaged (bottled water, Nutrigrain bars, yougurt) and I don't really do dinner, but sometimes I make toast with my cereal.

Yay for Allie!

Trish said...

Does this mean all the adults are secretly living like this? Who the fuck is doing all the banking? You know it's got to be aliens O_O

DonnaB. said...

I love you in a way that is not at all healthy.

It's like you're spying on me, and I know I should be creeped out, but instead I hope you never stop.

Anonymous said...

Please procreate so I can see what your cartoon baby will look like and how it will f*ck with your life, your pie charts and your productivity graphs. You are f*cking hilarious!

http://mymommybites.blogspot.com/ said...

Please procreate so I can see what your cartoon baby will look like when it f*cks with your life circles and productivity charts.You are hilarious!

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Anonymous said...

spagatta nadle is in your graph!

Anonymous said...

This is exactly why I'm at the office at midnight on a Friday.

and still on the internets.

Andrea said...

So freaking funny! Your illustrations are priceless! My twin called me shortly after you posted this, and we laughed about how hilarious it was.

Then she proceeded to tell me all about the things she accomplished this week - like buying groceries and cleaning things - not even realizing she was doing your "I deserve a trophy" song and dance of Adult Week. Anyway, neither one of us has really become an adult yet, and we're both in our 30s and married. Oh well. :)

Cheryl said...

I'm in the same! But with MORE alcohol. Less Internet.

Oh, and no groceries. Fuck that. I don't have time with all the thinking I have to do everyday- about all the things I'm going to do.

Anonymous said...

Whoa, it is like you opened up my brain! I am currently on the good part of the spiral, before the decent into filth and guilt and internet...any day now...

Anonymous said...

Haha this is totally how it is for me too! Love this post.

Sara Jacob said...

TOTALLY off topic with the post. I wish I could figure out how to get pictures to be as big as the first and last ones here appear. HOW DO I DO THAT??? o.0

Also, being an adult is overrated.

Alijacket said...

This is my life, minus the nachos. Lately, it's just been cereal. I eat cereal like four times a day, every day. Then a real meal comes along and I don't even know what to do with it.

The email part made me shiver. It's like you're in my head. I have two people I need to get back to, but it's been a week since I should've replied. But, you know, as a recent graduate who's 24 and unemployed, I'm just too busy to do things on time. I feel so guilty and gross for not replying, but what am I supposed to do now? Face them? No, thanks. Thanks for making me feel a tiny little bit better for being such a lame-o procrastinator. :)

Anonymous said...

Me too.... it's 2:15am. I got promoted at work today, so clearly I will spiral into a haze of self-doubt and re-reading this post until I self destruct. Neat!

Bev said...

I've just discovered that people who go through this cycle CAN still take care of a baby 24/7 successfully, because nothing makes you get things done (okay not ALL things, but SOME things) like someone screaming wordlessly at you at the top of their lungs.

Erica said...

Holy shit, you're funny. I heart you.

Twiggy said...

This so much my life it's creppy. Exhibit one: I read this post the same day you posted it but I haven't commented it until now. Writing this comment has taken FOREVER because I kept forgeting what I was going to say, and spelling is fucking hard! I had to google exhibit to spell it right.

Love your blog, it's amazing and if I could I would give you a pink-kick-ass-unicorn because that would be the best animal ever.

Paige said...

Glad to know I'm not the only one. But hey, my house is clean right now! :-D

Amanda said...

It's so true. It's just so, so true...

MC Etcher said...

I laughed out loud! That is so nice! I don't do that very often.

Inquartata said...

This is me. This is me as a stare at more than a few checks I really should deposit in my bank account. This is me as I realize I really need to go grocery shopping and I really don't want to. I've even had my ADHD medication.

Being a grownup sucks. They should've told me this when I was a kid.

marfita said...

I'm 56 and this STILL describes me. By the way, I'm your blogspot neighbor so, like, finding me is hardly rocket surgery.

Paul said...

You never fail to put me in a better mood. Just flipping brilliant posting everytime. I have never seen illustration used so well EVER. I'm almost afraid to sit and go through all the old posts for fear I'll end up shirking all my responsibilities;)

Dallas Brooks said...

484 comments? Holy crap. You're really famous.

Keep bein' awesome, Allie. Keep bein' awesome.

Anonymous said...

hahly shaht you are me, only... 24! using my fingers as a calculator, that makes you 8 years older than me! so, am i to surmise that growing up and gaining responsibility is NOT necessarily going to happen to me as a side-effect of reaching the age where i need to be able to make my life work all by myself? i sort of thought there was a positive correlation between the amount of crap needing to be delt with and the capability to deal with said crap. apparantly this assumption was terribly naive and incorrect... this should make me deeply anxious about the state of my future, but for some reason i am very happy. thank you for showing me that you can be caught in a cycle of fail for your whole life and still be so totally win!

Anonymous said...

hahly shaht you are me, only... 24! using my fingers as a calculator, that makes you 8 years older than me! so, am i to surmise that growing up and gaining responsibility is NOT necessarily going to happen to me as a side-effect of reaching the age where i need to be able to make my life work all by myself? i sort of thought there was a positive correlation between the amount of crap needing to be delt with and the capability to deal with said crap. apparantly this assumption was terribly naive and incorrect... this should make me deeply anxious about the state of my future, but for some reason i am very happy. thank you for showing me that you can be caught in a cycle of fail for your whole life and still be so totally win!

Betsy said...

Sadly, this post perfectly describes my adventures in adulthood. Even more sadly, I turn 36 next month...

Anonymous said...

Hi Allie! Great post as always. I just wrote a blog post dedicated to your blog, using drawings inspired by yours. This place is awesome, keep it up!

http://yujinlikesandhates.wordpress.com/2010/06/19/19-likes-hyperbole-and-a-half/

Me! said...

*wipes tears from eyes*

I just discovered your blog completely by accident.

This has to the THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN.

I think I just made a complete fool of myself by laughing like a hyena on Ecstasy

OMG I can't tell you how much thats made me laugh!

Anonymous said...

"Attention-deficient squirrel on PCP"... Oh my God. Someone finally found a phrase to describe me accurately. Also, I totally do the Nachos-and-Internet thing, only it's more often Ramen. But sometimes nachos. Also sometimes quesadillas.

Anonymous said...

"Attention-deficient squirrel on PCP"... Oh my God. Someone finally found a phrase to describe me accurately. Also, I totally do the Nachos-and-Internet thing, only it's more often Ramen. But sometimes nachos. Also sometimes quesadillas.

Anonymous said...

"Attention-deficient squirrel on PCP"... Oh my God. Someone finally found a phrase to describe me accurately. Also, I totally do the Nachos-and-Internet thing, only it's more often Ramen. But sometimes nachos. Also sometimes quesadillas.

Anonymous said...

"Attention-deficient squirrel on PCP"... Oh my God. Someone finally found a phrase to describe me accurately. Also, I totally do the Nachos-and-Internet thing, only it's more often Ramen. But sometimes nachos. Also sometimes quesadillas.

badlydrawngirl said...

Yay someone else has the "No ... Internet ... Forever" joy face :D

PsyXe said...

Internet forever!
You know what? You don't have to grow up. All you really have to do is breathe and keep your heart beating, and make sure you eat something every now and again. I think everything works much better once you realise this.

Bee said...

This is hysterical, and so true. Fantastic, and love the drawings! I've just done the washing up which 'earnt' me the right to spend the rest of the evening on the internet, ignoring the heap of washing, the hoovering, the dusting... very familiar!

Anonymous said...

Wow - that's my life... exactly.

It's sort of comforting to see a lot of people making the same comment.

Anonymous said...

Alas, I am a proper adult - I was born that way I think.

Although, I have to say, I hate the bank too, and I'm not to cool with cleaning the bathroom.

I really ought to deposit a check I received AGES ago, then I could BUY FOOD. But I never learned how to so it's always embarrassing.

willow said...

LOVE!!! (and however you do those heart thingies)You just wrote my biography......only throw in little kids. Not just responsible for me, but THEM too!!!!! I don't know how people actually do all this. I just fake it and bs my way through.

Anonymous said...

FFFFFFFFFFFFFF WHO ARE YOU AND HOW IS IT YOU KNOW EXACTLY HOW MY LIFE HAS BEEN FOR THE LAST FEW YEARS

Seriously, everything about this is my life condensed. I laughed. I cried.

Kurtis said...

Endless tasks and endless to dos equal aggggggghhhhhhh!

Anonymous said...

How the heck do people manage cat hair? That's what I want to know. How can you add CAT HAIR to the "being an adult" equation and EVER, EVER win?!

James Shields said...

Wow! Have you been spying on me?

WVKay said...

I'm 54 years old and this is me. Especially the Internet and 3:17 a.m. part.

Tomer said...

Yet another 21st century illness that will probably redefine Health. Wonderful wonderful post!

Valkyri said...

I'm forty-friggin-two and I still do this, being immature was so much easier around '95 when I found the Internet...

so those of you looking for a solution? GOOD LUCK!

Joseph said...

I'm going to join the chorus of people saying that you just described their life. Seriously.

Unknown said...

Bahahaha, I'm totally the same way, hell, I'm nearing the peak of the swing, what with finally moving out of the frat house and into my own place, this first "on my own" crash is gonna be hilariously awful.

t said...

i lold, great post btw hows the book coming ive been reading ur old posts and found the 1 where u were all stalker ninja-ish hiding in the bushes and was wondering if you ever finished it or gave up

Owen Dennis! said...

I've seen many a blog but this is the first one I've ever actually added to my reader. This is high quality writing and I really appreciate that. Very real and very awesome. I hope my blog can be like this. I live in China right now and I talk a lot about the cultural differences and stuff. I can think of a couple articles you might be interested in. I'll link them even though this seems like a plug.

This is one that shows the weirdest theme park ever:
http://owendennis.com/blog/archives/1674

This is one where I fed a live chicken to a tiger like a badass: http://owendennis.com/blog/archives/1700

And the post where I found out that the Chinese government blocked my website so I switched to fake Spanish in order to trick them:
http://owendennis.com/blog/archives/1375

I understand if you don't have time to read them, just seemed like something you might be into. Again, love your blog, especially the drawings. They really puncuate the writing. Awesome.

Owen

Anonymous said...

i think this method of self-induced crash and burn adequately sums up everyone who is in their early 20's.

Unknown said...

I am SO glad Kellie posted this on her blog!!! i love this!

Unknown said...

So I just noticed that your copyright at the bottom is a reference to Zero Wing for the Sega Genesis. Colossal. Win.

Steve said...

http://www.c2.com/cgi/wiki?DisplacementActivity

Katie said...

This is how it works for me. I start out with the Grown-Up Pants on:

"Hmmm, yes, I think I'll change my contents insurance provider."

Then, about 3 weeks later, it ends up:

"You want me to do what??! Look, I spend 7.36 hours a day slaving away for The Man, and now you want me to spend God-knows-how much of MY precious Me-Time sitting on the phone listening to your horrendous on-hold music and being told in a meta-ironic way how important I am to you? Well, FUCK you buddy! And the horse you rode in on!!"

Chrysalis said...

Automate the redundant tasks.
Shop online, Bank online, Mount air purifiers on ever concievable surface in your home that collects dust, get a washing machine that also dries your clothes with the clothes on hangers, create a laundry shute and controls so that you can set up laundry from your room, get a conveyor belt that transports your clothes back to your room after they dry putting them directly into your closet, get some goats that will mow/weed your lawn better than a Roomba, get a machine that will prepare/cook meals for you requiring only precisely measured cooking ingredients, put additional clutter at a storage place, get motion sensor lights installed all over your house so you don't have to use light switches, get a segway so you don't have to walk through your house, get a surrogate so you never have to drive to work, chat online, chat on skype, Get a clothing printer to make any cool clothes that you wish existed but don't have (pants, shirts, hats with whatever designs or styles you want), start your own utility company (using a power source of your choice) so you don't have to pay for electricity, design/build robots that make robots... profit.

Tim said...

Great post! You get lots of points for self-awareness. Only, obviously what we all need is not to earn points, but to receive grace.

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monkeybitch the agnostic prophet said...

I think someone painted the insides of our heads the same colour - except on my brain instead of using the ADHD kind of brush they used the depression kind of brush.

Terry Legend said...

I've only recently found your blog and can't stop reading everything. I start a new job on Monday. I might end up missing my first day. Balls

nicki2712 said...

It's so reassuring to see other people react to being a 'grown up' in much the same way that I do. Because lets face facts, Internet is way more interesting than just about anything the real world can throw at us....especially cleaning!

squint said...

Strangely, I think accomplished maximal adultiness at around age 19, and have been in decline ever since, so now at 43, collecting the mail and showering seem like a bit much to try to do on the same day.

Unknown said...

Do you even read comment number 5, 234?

I feel much like that, except I have two kids who look to me for, oh, I don't know... EVERYTHING. Hubby just bought me an iTouch today. Yeah. THAT should help me get shit done around the house. :P

thegreatkatsby said...

well, after reading your blog for six months you have finally invaded my subconsciousness. last night i had a dream you were trapped in mud and drowning and i pulled you out. you're welcome. then i introduced you to my grandma as a "famous blogger".

also, as a fellow adhd'er i was wondering if you have ever read "getting things done" by david allen? i'm reading it now and it makes a lot of sense.

Anonymous said...

"The worst part is wondering how you’ll find the strength tomorrow to go on doing what you did today and have been doing for much too long, where you’ll find the strength for all that stupid running around, those projects that come to nothing, those attempts to escape from crushing necessity, which always founder and serve only to convince you one more time that destiny is implacable, that every night will find you down and out,
crushed by the dread of more and more sordid and insecure tomorrows. And maybe it’s treacherous old age coming on, threatening the worst. Not much music left inside us for life to dance to. Our youth has gone to the ends of the earth to die in the silence of the truth. And where, I ask you, can a man escape to, when he hasn’t enough madness left inside him? The truth is an endless death agony. The truth is death. You have to choose: death or lies. I’ve never been able to kill myself."

— Louis-Ferdinand Céline (Journey to the End of the Night)

Jackie said...

Oh my word, that hit too close too home. Yesterday I fooled my 6- month pregnant body into thinking that it would be a good idea to take on all kinds of cleaning and organizing projects. Now I sit here ON THE INTERNET staring at a living room strewn with half completed projects while I wait for out-of-town guests to arrive. For crying out loud...

Michelle said...

LOL!!! As everyone else has said, this is totally me. I'm 42. The other day I almost slipped walking down the stairs in my apartment. My first thought, literally the first thing that popped in my head, was that if I broke my leg I would have to crawl through my apartment and out the front door into the entrance way so the paramedics wouldn't see my apartment.

I have been wasting time on the internets today for about 6 hours after writing a two page list of crap I need to accomplish. I am a champion list maker. I even break down tasks into mini tasks so it's easier to cross things off. Instead of "clean the kitchen" I have "put dirty dishes in sink" and "clean outside of fridge". Adulthood FTW!

Richard Rondonuwu said...

TYrips here, for the first time!!!

hahahahahahaha..,
i mean, thats right. So hard to be an adult. More precisely, your life will be so biring cos everyday you will do it the same things.

'we live, only once! so why we must do just one thing for this life!!'

Nice to visited your blog, from Indonesian!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm a 28 year old life-long procrastinator...right now my motivation to do job-related responsible grown-up things is so I can eventually pay other people to do annoying responsible grown-up things for me, like clean my house and deliver my groceries. I finally figured out that the majority of successful adults have time to get semi-important things done because they pay other people to do the monotonous, time-sucking chores that everyone avoids.

M0 said...

Wow! This is so funny! I discovered your blog not long ago and read all the posts, and have been eagerly checking my "Following" box since then! Keep being awesome! Please?

Miss Maiar said...

I absolutely do this. Right now I am avoiding:

-schoolwork
-paying bills
-yelling at the credit card company for freezing my card despite my having paid it
-doing work for my actual job
-leaving my room

The Internet. It solves everything, really. And it doesn't need you to be wearing pants like the rest of the stupid judgemental world. Or my roommate.

Additionally, things that need to be said:

a) You are awesome. You are also my hero. You also made me nearly choke to death with laughter and definitely scare the dog with my squeaky-choking noises. So congrats for that.

b) I read your entire blog yesterday. It took me four and a half hours. I will never get those hours back, but it was fucking awesome so that's okay. I'm not going to apologize for saying fuck, though, because fuck is an awesome word. Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck. See?

c) You are 57,893 times funnier than me. This is both awesome, because it means you are a shining beacon of hilarity, and also tragic because I am now filled with all-consuming despair that I will never be funny. You have reset my bar for funniness. I thought I was funny, but I was wrong. Now I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. So good job there.

d) I am totally kidding. I'm going to be a librarian and then I'm going to be a famous author. I thought I should clear that up so that you didn't feel bad.

e) Don't ever change. Lots of people would be sad. And also have less things to laugh at.

f) I ended that sentence with a preposition, for which my English-major brain is punishing me by making my left eye twitch. But I'm not going to go back and correct it because it sounds funnier than "things at which to laugh," and anyway I, not my English degree, is in charge of my brain. Ha.

Anonymous said...

This is so me! I am hoping that I will be responsible when I have kids - or at least I can put some type of remote locator thing on them I misplace them

Unknown said...

Sigh, I have a different problem. I am not responsible. How is this different? I make sure that at any given point in time, I am not supposed to be doing anything. My place stays clean because I don't do anything to mess it up, I ignore my bank account except for paying bills online, and buying food when I run out and find out I'm hungry. Other than that, all I do is read and play games, or explore the internet.

I think we're all adults, we just need to become mature, and realize that being responsible is achieved not by doing things, but by making sure nobody expects us to do anything.

Unknown said...

OMG YOU'RE ME.

And I'm 45. *sigh*

Karen said...

B. Miller - Dude, me too!!

xo Allie, you always make my day :D

*~Dani~* said...

This completely describes me. Although I have an adult job and responsibility, the rest of my "adult" falls by the wayside. I have to write to-do lists every day with like three things on it: 1. go to bank, 2. take in drycleaning, 3. mail movies back.

So sad.

Anonymous said...

Why haven't you been writing? Allie, I MISS YOU!

John said...

I love your blog, but it's a little unnerving how your ponytail seems to be morphing into some sort of shark fin. You might wanna get that checked out.

NayNay said...

Hahahahaha, this is the story of my life!

Rebecca Christiansen said...

INTERNET! FOREVER...

So, basically my life, then. Cool xD

husdfak said...

Wow. You just summed up my life, only you had the intelligence to put it into words. I could never have even analyzed it to a point that I could explain my problem to someone else. Bravo for being better than me.

ThePeachy1 said...

I had 47 things on my to do list. I manged to complete 2.7 of those at some level or another ( like not really but did it half ass and still counted it)... So I still considered it a win, because I threw the damn list in the chimney. Also thanks to the economy I rarely have to go to the bank anymore...

Jessica said...

I am super glad that I am not the only person that does this! I will never ever ever be an official adult..never. Its really a better choice..for all involved.

Holly Grahym said...

Wow! Your blog is great! I just spent, oh, two or so hours reading it even though my plan was to get ALOT of things accomplished today, but I'm kind-of hungover from all the fun I had yesterday, which included losing my bikini bottoms and jewelry being towed behind a boat on an inner tube, but I was able to make it to the grocery store today, where I somehow bought $70 worth of produce which is totally going to go bad before I can eat all of it, and then I decided to take a quick break before tackling my to-do list, so I went to the internetz and stumbled upon your site and now it is two hours later and I've accomplished nothing on my to-do list, because going to the grocery store wasn't even on my to-do list, but it doesn't matter because your blog is full of AWESOME AND RAINBOWS! Also, I kind-of have a headache now from looking at the screen for so long. So, I guess you should send me some Advil or something because it is clearly your fault for writing such entertaining entries about procrastination, bears, and absurdity. I'll have my neurologist call you.

Anyway, keep writing!

argie-loser said...

i have to show this to my psychiatry

you are a genius

Tanya HK Diaries said...

HAHAHA - genius... made my monday morning (fully committed to my adult life... obviously)

kahping said...

I'm a fellow procrastinator too. Always it's back and forth trying to be better then getting all smug about it and finally it's back to square one.

Thanks, you made my day :-)

Ojaye said...

I tried to be like this last weekend and ended up sleeping until 3pm.

There needs to be a support group but I don't think anyone would be organised enough to show up. D:

Anonymous said...

Well then, I guess I will never be a real grown-up. I'm 46 and you have just perfectly described my life. Don't worry though, being grown-up is overrated.

Tom "Avenuewriter" said...

So true, I loved the graph that's exactly my thought process 100 percent!

Maura said...

I see "clean all the things!" is very popular (yes, I laughed too), but "clean *all* the things?" gets me right where I live. I love the tears welling up in her eyes, poor overwhelmed thing. I may need to watch several hours of television, in sympathy.

Unknown said...

clean up *all* the things?

Sandrine said...

This is genius! Captures the feeling just right. Sometimes I wonder how I do in fact get anything done given that I have commitments as an academic and a mother. Like, how am in going to get my article finished and my son's schooling sorted out for next year given I'm currently lying on the sofa surfing the net and it's 10.30am???? And I love your pictures.

Gabriela said...

Sent this to a friend who had this to say:

"hahaha holy shit. did my fingers write that while i was asleep?"

Also, it's now 12:39 am. I have been exhausted since seven pm, but have spent SIX HOURS wasting time on the internet. I'm unstoppable.

Gabriela said...

Sent this to a friend who had this to say:

"hahaha holy shit. did my fingers write that while i was asleep?"

Also, it's now 12:39 am. I have been exhausted since seven pm, but have spent SIX HOURS wasting time on the internet. I'm unstoppable.

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Robbie said...

I love girls who create ADHD-infused blomics in Paint. Total number I know of is one (you). I am reading many past posts right now.

The following friend referred me to you:
http://theshortestword.wordpress.com/2010/06/21/hyperbole-and-a-half/

Lady Wordsmith said...

I mean, like, seriously, why would anyone want to be an adult anyway? My aunt was 48 yesterday, and she said to her mother 'Mum, I wish I could grow up'. Why the hell would anyone want to grow up, I thought to myself, I certainly don't. Sure, I've got kids and responsibilities and stuff, but I don't ever intend to be an adult. I think adultness is overrated, and very, very dull.

;) Let's be kids forever!

Calico said...

Wow. I was just going to ask how you find time to write posts AND read your comments and still find time to be awesome, when I noticed that you have over 500 comments! Which explains why there is no post for today. Actually I don't know if you post every day.

Which brings me to my reason for commenting.

I LOVED (understatement. But I am so sick of saying adored and obsessed and I have only had one cup of coffee so I can't think of anymore words) your post. It is the only recent one I have read though and it was because a friend posted it on Facebook. And I couldn't resist.

I don't read your recent posts because I'm weird about reading things in order. I've only just got to November last year. so it's back in time for me. I'm feeling really uncomfortable about skipping ahead.

ayesha said...

OMG. you just described my life. except throw a kid in there.

Keda said...

wow - that many comments, most of them saying that they do exactly the same thing (i am making an assumption as i seriously do not have time to read all comments during the time that i am slacking off from work).

of course i do the same thing. i create lists and lists and lists and every 4 to 6 months, i actually start on one of them. i have tried going it all at once and i have tried doing it step by step.

it does not work.

so now i am just not being grown up anymore...

but all this does make me ponder, if so many people are not being grown up (all of us at age of suppose-to-be-grown-up along with all the actual not-grown-ups out there), why does the world still make everyone think that they need to be grown up? it's working much better without grown ups as far as i can tell....

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Anonymous said...

I love you.
Srsly.
This is me to a fucking T.
I'm at the internet surfing/hermit stage. I don't like being a growed-up 23 yr old, it's tiring and my belly hurts all the time and I just want to stay home and sleep :(

racheleanore said...

I'm sure by now you've stopped reading comments, but on the off chance you do, here's what I have to say.

I know this is a humorous take on real life I just want to reassure you, if you ever feel guilty for not being a responsible adult, you are not alone. Nobody has it all together like they seem. Even the ones (like me) who pay their bills on time, moderately enjoy grocery shopping and cleaning and general responsible adultness still have bad days/weeks/months. Everybody gets stuck in guilt spirals and many of us want to curl up in a corner.

Obviously, I only know about you from what you say on your blog/facebook/twitter (yeah, I'm a stalker too), but you are much more responsible than you give yourself credit for. You're also talented and creative, which a lot of 'responsible' adults completely lack.

Okay, enough of my lecturing. Time for nachos. :-)

Bradley said...

Bank? pfft! You only need the bank if you actually get paid!

Ahh... living the dream.

Bones said...

Allie you're my soul mate...

Jen said...

Hey there, found your blog a while ago, good to see you are getting some recognition!

This latest post left me in a fit of giggles, and I think is something that everyone can certainly relate to!

Keep up the good work, you are permanently bookmarked. Take care!

s.e. said...

This is awesome! I'm glad I'm not alone. I mean, I microwave lean cuisines usually, but otherwise this is ME. I feel validated. :)

I'm going to start stalking your blog so I always feel validated and totally normal.

jwla said...

This is absolutely the way I feel about everything. It seems, though, day-by-day I am doing more and more adult things. I'd rather not do them, and I am certainly enjoying the fight to keep myself from being an adult.

Also, today is the day I finished reading EVERYTHING (aside from the B-Sides--I am saving that bit of reading!)! It only took me ~4 days!

Danger Boy said...

As always, freaking hilarious.
And frighteningly familiar.

FlyBoy said...

Right now I should be writing an email with detailed instructions on how to transfer routes and waypoints to an old Garmin GPS...but I'm not. I here reading your blog, also reading all the comments makes me feel less alone in this "adult chase" we have going on.

Anonymous said...

okay, do you have cameras in my house?
awesomeness.

annie a said...

I'm with the previous poster that says "nobody has it all together".

I'm an official grown-up, 32 years old, married, with kids. Bills, mortgage, dog, the whole shebang.
The only reason I cook balanced meals are my children. When they're not around, I eat Ramen noodles and ice cream.

I HATE cleaning and will only do the bare minimum, to avoid being a complete slob in front of my mother-in-law. I have never cleaned my oven (my husband done it 3-4 times in the last decade) and do not own an iron.

hang in there, do one thing at a time. don't get overwhelmed by the sum of all adult things!

and keep writing, we love you!

Jerseygirl said...

I really feel like you just read my thoughts but made them much, much funnier.

Jet said...

It's okay. My inbox is in the 5 digits already =D

Unknown said...

This. Is. Me. Totally. I'll let you know if I figure out a way to moderate it . . . I would probably be a bagillionaire if I did.

Jenny said...

Yes, I will also buy a t-shirt w/ picture of dejected girl and "Clean ALL the things?" written on it. This will probably make you rich.

Anonymous said...

Basically, if you drew yourself with icing bag looking boobies you'd be drawing me. And, that about sums everything up.

Anonymous said...

yeah.. I think of all of those Disney flicks with songs about making work fun... to whistle while you work, for example, is incredibly annoying for co-workers and can get you nasty looks, uncomfortable talks with supervisors, and ambushes in the parking lot after closing time. Disney is an empire of LIES!

elle said...

exactly right.
awesome.

Stacey said...

Can we start a club ? Or a support group ? Wait that might require too much "adult ness" and clearly we're all lacking that.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I never knew that the Blogger comment section had the capacity for "Newer> Newest>>" navigating links!

I actually talking about this exact thing on the telephone with my big sister and scrolling through my Google Reader list when I read this. I had to read it to her. We don't curse, so I had to glide over some bits, and she hasn't had a chance to see your fabutastic illustrations yet, but she totally got it. And the squirrel bit killed her.

Also, previous commentors - I just want to let you know that your comments totally, totally were the icing on this post.

Allie, you (and a great majority of readers) should be famous for your wit.

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Anonymous said...

I do that too, except mostly just with school work. I always start off each semester getting all my homework done on time, doing a really good job on it, and being super organized and all that, and then after a week or two I feel like I've worked hard enough that I should be done, and spend the rest of the semester procrastinating and doing the absolute minimum I need to to turn things in at all.

With actual grow-up responsibilities I usually only get as far as deciding to do them before I start procrastinating on doing them. I'm managed to avoid being an adult so far, and since I'm lucky enough that I basically get along with my parents and they're not going to kick me out (ever, I think), I probably have a good decade or so left on that. I'm 23, still in college, still live my parents when I'm not at school and in a dorm with a meal plan at school, and the closest I've had to a real job has been working for my mom, my mom's friends, or soon my mom's friend's friend (for a whole two hours a week!).

I think that even people who seem like real adults don't ever quite have *everything* together though. Take my parents for example... They're not only grown-up, they're super successful at it. I mean, they have two kids, who are both in college, and they're paying full tuition for both of us (and can still afford to take all sorts of fancy vacations, usually with all four of us, a couple times a year). They've been happily married for, I don't know, probably close to 30 years. They're both really successful at their jobs, and even actually use their PhDs, but manage to have dinner as a family almost every night. My mom drove my sister and I to all sorts of activities all the time until we could drive ourselves, and does the dishes almost every day. My dad cooks dinner most nights, takes our three dogs to the park at least once a week, and makes sure our three cats get enough attention after the dogs go to sleep every night. They have a nice house, which is generally clean, apart from my room, and always manage to make everything spotless for company and all that.

But even so, a few weeks ago the utility company shut off our water cause my dad had forgotten to pay the bill for so long, and at various points we've also had cell phones shut off for the same reason, and I've been denied registration at school and/or had my grade withheld until my dad paid my tuition more than once. My mom has scheduled appointments for me and forgotten to tell me many times, and once actually left the house without my sister to take her to some appointment or other. She also once told me she was not Martha Steward when I said she should wash off the blood that had been on the seat in her car for weeks. And when my dad's out of town, all my mom cooks are eggs and pasta. But if my mom's out of town, my dad still doesn't do the dishes, and they just accumulate until my mom gets back, my sister or I do them (and by that I mean my sister does them, although I did once pay her to do them for me), or we run out of dishes entirely (and btw, we have a dishwasher, so it's not like I'm talking about actually washing dishes by hand or anything).

Kathy at Wellness Roadtrip said...

I so look like that when I stand next to my washing machine! No one else knows how to do laundry...so I am a goddess when I return clean clothes to my teens. Then I earn a lot of points.

Jaedia said...

Oh God that is me in a nutshell ._.
Right now I have to finish this blog post RIGHT NOW. Agh.
Tomorrow I must clean all the things.
Wednesday I take a break. And Thursday. And Friday... Saturday I clean all the things. /pattern.

marinda said...

I wish I could report that at age 50 I have overcome the cycle but sadly...

Chase said...

thank you for taking a blog post to describe me in actuality.

(How did you know I wear a pink dress-like shirt and no pants all of the time??)

Kernut said...

AHHAAA! You've just captured and summed-up my life in one post I love the attention-deficit squirrel on PCP. That's gonna be my new nickname! LOL

Rob said...

That's exactly how I was. Then I read "Getting Things Done" by David Allen. Yeah, I know what you're thinking, but his system actually works. Do yourself a favor, get the book, read it and actually apply his method. Then make yourself a "Next Action" to thank me. ;)

NinaCherie: said...

This may be my favorite so far... because it's me. And I think you're right, you won't ever be an adult, cuz I'm 43, and I'm still riding this cycle on a regular basis. The only difference with me is that instead of ALWAYS reverting to surfing, about half of the time I lose myself in a book til 3am instead, but the results are the same. I'm glad I'm not alone! =)

The Tall One said...

This is why I'll never be an adult. http://thekitchenphotos.blogspot.com/

Dallas Brooks said...

Allie,

After reading this post, I must concede that ...
...
...
you're the best a-roooooound
nothing's gonna ever keep you down!
something something something something
the best a-roooound!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fWvub_WBho

Aiadrín said...



Enough said. This is simply amazing. I do believe I'll be following *ahemstalkingahem* this amazing-ness. Why are you so amazing? I don't get it! I wanna it!!! D:

INTERNET!!! ♥

Clean ALL the things? No thanks, I'll just pass and *sniff* "Oh, that's clean. I'm good" :D :D

Christine said...

This is my life, exactly. Hilarious.

valerie said...

i totally feel like this! i have been putting off going to the bank to DEPOSIT MONEY for a week!!!

MadameDefarge76 said...

I totally want a t-shirt with CLEAN ALL THE THINGS! on it.

Oklungz said...

Exactly. Thank you!

Anonymous said...

I'm 57 and still waiting to be a real adult. Drop the guilt - or you'll be wasting a lot of time.

-Jill

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Unknown said...

Give me your all 8023263 U.S.dollar.Thank you ,I don't konw you,Lv Man ,miss u,forever. Two years, said in my all life ,miss you come on look out! 张少锋 测试

Amanda M. said...

I'm currently in the "CLEAN ALL THE THINGS! :D" stage. Oh how the mighty will fall.

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