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Melodramatic Cards




33 comments:

  1. Aww...these are sweet. No more scouring supermarkets for the perfect cards. :D

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  2. You totally captured the way I feel about my boyfriend. Do you mind if I send him one of these and let him think I'm the clever one?

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  3. aaaaaand desktop background hahahaha

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  4. Me and my guy used to say "I would love you even if a crocodile bit your face off." I feel like that might make a lovely melodramatic card.

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  5. I think the fact that I'd be genuinley pleased to receive any one of those cards shows just how valentine's desperate I am.

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  6. So boycotting Valentine's day means forgoing electrical shock, avoiding chiropractic care and saving kittens?

    I knew I was on the right track!

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  7. These are pretty b.a. I didn't think I'd get my boyfriend a card. I think I might just print yours out. lol. (:

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  8. So like, you won't kill flowers but you will kill kittens?

    You sir, are an officer and a gentleman.

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  9. awesome. i sent fiance one that said, "for valentine's day I got you the clap," from some ecards. classic!

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  10. i'm not crab crawling across the desert for anyone...

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  11. This post is soaked in awesomesauce.




    That sounds seriously dirty.




    The End.

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  12. I didn't get that the kittens were being killed. I just thought this was a repurposing of already-dead kittens. Poor kitten! It's dead, but at least it can be used to spread some Valentiney cheer!

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  13. Ha! For the record, I wrote about killing kittens in my PM to you on the forum before I read this post on your blog. What are the chances we'd both say something about the same thing independently?!

    What a co-inkidink.

    Or maybe it's not so weird. EIther way.

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  14. In my mind, there is nothing that expresses the true nature of love and romance more than a dead kitten.

    But try finding a heart shaped box to put it in! Not that easy.

    Awesome, as usual!

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  15. You have the sexiest creative mind in the history of creative minds.

    I want to make sweet passionate love to the squishy insides of your imaginative brain.

    I'd be synapsing the shit around the axon terminal of your neurons.....

    ....or....something.

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  16. The above comment has made me all HAWT.

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  17. I actually really love the first one. I would totally give that as a V-Day card.

    Actually, I gave zombie Valentine's last year.

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  18. I printed out the last one and gave it to my husband. I totally gave you credit though.

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  19. I made my husband get me Starbucks. I somehow feel cheated now.

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  20. "... but I'd still get you one."

    Oh that was just fantastic. :-)

    Pearl

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  21. You are too funny. I've added you to my blogroll.

    Pearl

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  22. Dood. I don't know who these creepy stalkers are who left you those messages the other day, but you can tell them to step the F back.
    I OWN stalking you, and I would TOTALLY be on my way to Montana (because, HELLO, true stalkers know where you live) with a trunk full of duct tape and grass clippings and a bowl of water (so you'd have stuff to eat after I captured you like you do with box turtles and stuff), wearing a diaper so I wouldn't have to stop, and crying while screaming the lyrics to the complete works of Hall & Oates - I mean, if I didn't have to get a bunch of stuff done this week and we didn't just have two blizzards, and if I didn't have to leave my kids or my husband or, let's be honest, my house and especially my yoga pants.
    That's because I would stalk you best.

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  23. If I had a boyfriend, I would absolutely give him one of your cards.

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  24. I've always felt that nothing says I love you more than a dead stalker..... Your comments section reads like boyfriend is going to get a plenty of opportunity to bag you a present for next Valentines day. If I were you I would be disappointed if you don't get at least a dozen. Tell him not to send them by regular post though, the Posties get pissie enough when they are expected to deliver regular letters. I get death threats if I receive more than a couple of parcels in the same month, Christmas is a nightmare...

    On second thoughts,"Nothing says I love you like a dead Bishops Stortford Postie", tell boyfriend you won't tolerate anything less and you are not willing to wait till next year....

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  25. if i had a boyfriend at the moment then i would definitely give him one of these cards that are so wondefully drawn. maybe ill suggest it to my loved up friends..

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  26. If only they sold these cards at Hallmark. You could make a fortune!

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  27. Allie Allie Allie! This has nothing to do with your awesome melodramatic valentines but I saw this and thought of you - BEARFIGHT! http://www.banneryearpress.com/bearfight/

    I was like, you know who makes super kickass drawings of bear fights...Allie. So I had to share lol

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  28. I myself am a big fan of the crab-crawl for love.
    funny stuff lady!

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  29. In my house, every day is like Valentine's Day.

    Dead. Cats. Everywhere.

    I really need to hire a cleaning lady.

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  30. Flowers are the sex organs of plants.

    Therefore, shouldn't we be sending just cat genitals to our loved ones, rahter than the whole cat?

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I'm super creepy and totally capable of finding you