tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post1187720858204241883..comments2024-03-18T13:15:52.672-06:00Comments on Hyperbole and a Half: Stabbing, and on a Scale of One to 10, It's a SevenAlliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04259303604002690708noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-87462236007928871652010-01-06T02:53:20.408-07:002010-01-06T02:53:20.408-07:00Tell them you are a writer, working in experimenta...Tell them you are a writer, working in experimental forms of self-criticism.dogimohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01278980067086209626noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-74142051691318405142010-01-05T04:42:20.747-07:002010-01-05T04:42:20.747-07:00oh god, i just read this out to my boyfriend and n...oh god, i just read this out to my boyfriend and now i'm wiping the tears of laughter out of the corner of my eye. you are hilarious, this whole situation is hilarious. i love you!katieleighhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07117317412166967580noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-6645671371634280212010-01-05T04:32:59.923-07:002010-01-05T04:32:59.923-07:00omg i literally LOL while reading this specificall...omg i literally LOL while reading this specifically the middle part of it... this is splendiferously written!!!!!!Jovial Connoisseurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00564391010214994360noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-20977760701096598792010-01-04T01:06:26.509-07:002010-01-04T01:06:26.509-07:00hey ... you are wonderful :)hey ... you are wonderful :)LimaraDevonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08709205546324930078noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-78915703768868867192010-01-02T00:44:32.305-07:002010-01-02T00:44:32.305-07:00Crap, stupid Samsung Behold cut me off. Stupid new...Crap, stupid Samsung Behold cut me off. Stupid new phone. <br /><br />I was saying ... <br /><br />"... where I talk futurism, music, using yams as weapons, movies, the merits of G.I. Joe, music, culture and make jokes about pie."<br /><br />Then the jerk either walks away or becomes useful. I either practiced my shpiel or nailed it. All around awesome.<br /><br />You're welcome."<br /><br />Or something like that.Hannibal Tabu, The Operativehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301121007071483636noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-31448790073899009902010-01-02T00:13:11.584-07:002010-01-02T00:13:11.584-07:00Sarah P. had the right idea. Also, she's hilar...Sarah P. had the right idea. Also, she's hilarious. In short, brazen it out.<br /><br />Writers often forget it's actually two jobs: doing the work, and talking about the work (hopefully so people will give you money). In Sarah's spirit, even on my less-than-awesome temp phone, I'll illustrate.<br /><br />JERK: So, what do you do, Hannibal?<br /><br />HT: I work on websites for [MAJOR NON-PROFIT THAT MIGHT NOT WANNA KNOW HOW WEIRD I AM], and do some writing on the side.<br /><br />JERK: [INSERT CONVERSATION ABOUT FIXING THEIR COMPUTER, WHICH I DEFLECT BY INDIFFERENCE OR MOCKERY] So, what do you write?<br /><br />HT: I have a weekly column reviewing comic books on cbr.cc, I'm a published poet and there's my novel on Amazon ...<br /><br />JERK: Oh, my, that's a lot. What is your novel about?<br /><br />HT: It's magical realism, speculative fiction stuff. Boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, girl turns out to be 8,500 years old, much hilarity ensues.<br /><br />JERK: [NOT GETTING IT] Oh.<br /><br />HT: Then there's my blogs and Twitter, where I talk music, futurism, movies, usHannibal Tabu, The Operativehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17301121007071483636noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-81760155199978453582010-01-01T13:12:36.488-07:002010-01-01T13:12:36.488-07:00that's a tough one, when people get all up in ...that's a tough one, when people get all up in your business and you have to be polite because you don't want to embarrass the boyfriend, or give them ammunition so they can talk him into leaving you when you go to the bathroom. i usually explain my writing in ways that will make people feel stupid for not getting it. like, 'oh, it'd be like if william shatner and dolly parton drank a bunch of pucker and got into a kiss-off with some leprechauns'. i mean, what the fuck does that even mean. i like to leave them guessing, but intrigue them enough to get off of their lazy asses and go find out for themselves. happy new year, and thanks for the laughs.Simonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10290531815250872371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-84428812866084072692010-01-01T10:15:01.376-07:002010-01-01T10:15:01.376-07:00"You know that stuff that you think, but thin..."You know that stuff that you think, but think it's too weird and neurotic to say out loud? It's that."<br /><br />They'll either like neurotic and check it out, or they won't.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-83299197609392732282010-01-01T09:29:23.492-07:002010-01-01T09:29:23.492-07:00Duh. You've already summed up the blog quite n...Duh. You've already summed up the blog quite nicely, "Indescribable Awesomness." And if they don't get that well that's your natural selection right there.Chlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09407958244195890009noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-29116575925884023842010-01-01T03:02:43.594-07:002010-01-01T03:02:43.594-07:00great post Allie.
:)
Happy and fantastic new year ...great post Allie.<br />:)<br />Happy and fantastic new year to you<br />:)<br /><br />you rwak!!Sorcererhttp://www.evilsfury.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-89754604605880642292010-01-01T00:13:16.118-07:002010-01-01T00:13:16.118-07:00Awesome post!! N yeah, it's so bad explaining ...Awesome post!! N yeah, it's so bad explaining blogging to ppl who hav absolutely no idea about it!!<br /><br />N ur scale of pain is kewl! ;D<br /><br />Happy New Yearr!!!Saadihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06330931132103830002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-36409795621858725592009-12-31T23:38:10.899-07:002009-12-31T23:38:10.899-07:00I am relieved to realize that my firstborn is safe...I am relieved to realize that my firstborn is safe. I was tempted by the drawing. But if you made another post instead of sending me a drawing, you would benefit the entire world. Thus I choose to be amazingly altruistic. ;)ShineForLifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10847422311455621206noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-79517601005522033342009-12-31T23:06:07.017-07:002009-12-31T23:06:07.017-07:00"retrovirus vector" looks like "vel..."retrovirus vector" looks like "velociraptor" when you're tired and reading in the dark.Boydhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17628627487963908203noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-42913898240826321412009-12-31T19:39:38.436-07:002009-12-31T19:39:38.436-07:00Solution:
Put on uberhip, toocoolforschool attitu...Solution:<br /><br />Put on uberhip, toocoolforschool attitude. Think Danny Zuko. Imply the word "bitch" at the end of every sentence.<br /><br />Questioner: Seeeeewwww, Allie, what dear little career have you carved out for yourself?<br /><br />Allie: *shrug, half roll eyes* I'm a blogger.<br /><br />Questioner: OHHH! I loooooove blogs. I read this weight loss blog that is JUST darling. And that one about the miscarriages. So poignant. I don't read that one, you know. I just read about it on the Times Web site.<br /><br />Allie: *reaches for another cucumber sandwich*<br /><br />Questioner: Anyway, Allie. What is your blog? I'd love to read it.<br /><br />Allie: *polishes off champagne, grabs Boyfriend's drink* Yeah. Not sure you'd get it.<br /><br />Questioner: Oh, dear. EVERY blogger thinks that at first. Have you seen "Julie & Julia"? You should. You'd find it inspirational.<br /><br />Allie: *shaking head* No. I mean, it's a humor blog. I don't think you'd get it.<br /><br />Questioner: OHHHH! A HUMOR blog! I LOVE humor! Have you seen that forward about 24 different kinds of poop! Harharhar LOLZies. Tooooo risque. Just can't help it. I love the off-color humor.<br /><br />Allie: Yeeeeah.<br /><br />Questioner: So, out with it! What's the blog? Can't wait to read it.<br /><br />Allie: Hyperbole and a Half.<br /><br />Questioner: * pause * What?<br /><br />Allie: Hyperbole and a Half<br /><br />Questioner: Hyperbole and a Half?<br /><br />Allie: Yep.<br /><br />Questioner: Wha-What does it mean?<br /><br />Allie: Yeah. If you don't get it, you don't get it.<br /><br />Boyfriend: *chuckle, chuckle, pat Allie's leg* Questioner, just go rent Season 1 of "Becker."<br /><br />Questioner: Well ... that was ... rude.<br /><br />Boyfriend: She uses "fuck" and has commenters who spend 20 minutes on major holidays leaving weird scripts for imaginary conversations. Also, she sends people to a separate blog to click on ads. That one is about cats, mostly. And sometimes our rats.<br />Also, we live together in sin, and Dane Cook isn't funny. Merry Christmas.<br /><br />Allie: I'll send you the link. Oh - and by the way - I win.Sarahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07322539753627427466noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-86066382570028892162009-12-31T16:08:40.539-07:002009-12-31T16:08:40.539-07:00Steamy's right, especially the part that invol...Steamy's right, especially the part that involves the cape and Bruce.linlahhttp://corn-bean.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-52392835541946613662009-12-31T15:43:50.519-07:002009-12-31T15:43:50.519-07:00are you seriously supporting yourself with proceed...are you seriously supporting yourself with proceeds from your blog? cuz if so, I kinda hate you. sorry :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-43692336998965828082009-12-31T15:38:47.941-07:002009-12-31T15:38:47.941-07:00On a scale of one to Rick Moranis, Rick Moranis is...On a scale of one to Rick Moranis, Rick Moranis is at Rick Moranis, that's how Rick Moranis-y he is.<br /><br />You should get business cards with your blog address printed out on them, and then a mission statement which is all vague and businesslike and ignorable, then people can make up their own minds.<br /><br />"Hyperbole and a Half - Striving Towards The Future, Because We Care"<br /><br />or<br /><br />"Corporate Dialectics In Modern Logistics."<br /><br />That'll keep 'em out.The Juleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10051844634899994750noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-28734163713080058642009-12-31T15:00:58.135-07:002009-12-31T15:00:58.135-07:00If laughter is the best medicine,( it's not, h...If laughter is the best medicine,( it's not, heroine is), then you are equally adept at curing AIDS, cancer, or the equally horrific acute uncontrollable diarrhea with rectal leakage as any doctor.Stylezhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12192629973499860655noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-81072291495866345722009-12-31T14:54:26.907-07:002009-12-31T14:54:26.907-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Stylezhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12192629973499860655noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-32341652004978817712009-12-31T14:42:47.552-07:002009-12-31T14:42:47.552-07:00Person: Oh, so you write blogs?
You: Yes.
Person...Person: Oh, so you write blogs?<br /><br />You: Yes.<br /><br />Person: What do you write about?<br /><br />You: I would tell you but I don't want to hurt your feelings.<br /><br />Person: Why would you hurt my feelings?<br /><br />You: Because after reading my blog, you'll realize that you'll never be as cool as me.Tonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11575553396396299732noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-89005162249818308202009-12-31T14:37:44.858-07:002009-12-31T14:37:44.858-07:00Steamy's idea is definitely the route to go. P...Steamy's idea is definitely the route to go. Perfect!Blaisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08937099732082990199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-7782944853071867922009-12-31T13:30:41.772-07:002009-12-31T13:30:41.772-07:00I'll have to ponder this and see if I can prop...I'll have to ponder this and see if I can propely describe your witty awesomeness in two words or less. <br /><br />Or even better, one word or less.Edhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11425014053974689270noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-36622328118879615692009-12-31T12:29:27.343-07:002009-12-31T12:29:27.343-07:00Like Dooce, with more mental illness.Like Dooce, with more mental illness.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-41438382937274429812009-12-31T12:19:16.049-07:002009-12-31T12:19:16.049-07:00You should definitely go the mysterious route like...You should definitely go the mysterious route like Steamy suggested. <br /><br />I try not to bring up blogging in conversation, in case they go looking and turn me in to child services, but I've had the occasional awkward moment.<br /><br />Person: "What are you doing?"<br />Me: "Typing."<br />Person: "What are you typing?"<br />Me: "Nothing."<br />Person: "It looks like something. Let me see."<br />Me: "I suggest you start backing up before I throw dem bows."<br />Person: Looks offended and slightly scared.<br />Me: Gangster back up chest thrusting move.<br /><br />The end.Alysonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05318995922395308120noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4643741973264866223.post-20588973449234150692009-12-31T11:56:04.737-07:002009-12-31T11:56:04.737-07:00My blog is called I Do Things So You Don't Hav...My blog is called I Do Things So You Don't Have To.<br /><br />When I tell people the name of my blog, they get all interested.<br /><br />"Oh, what <i>kind</i> of things do you do?"<br /><br />"Uh . . . well, I bought a door. Watched a porno. Ummm . . . Oh! I ate some sardines. And videotaped me eating them."<br /><br />By this time they've pretty much tuned out.<br /><br />Happy New Year!JD at I Do Thingshttp://idothings.infonoreply@blogger.com